But I have decided to skip the memorial campfire tomorrow night (well, actually tonight if ya wanna get all technical). I have had about all the sadness and tears that I can handle for one week. I realize that this is not going to be the same as a traditional funeral and that there will be many happy memories shared but I just can't bring myself to do it. The grieving that I am experiencing right now is not anywhere near over and I am not sure that I can take on any more. So I am sticking with my original plan for my night out with the girls from work. A little booze and some laughs with my super awesome girls is just what this kid needs after this wretched week!
I guess I should have prefaced this with a bit of a back story, huh? Well, here it is. Prior to losing my second mom on Sunday, the Scouting world lost a very good man on Friday evening. Scouter Rick was this little spitfire of a man that loved badge trading and campfires. He kept the spirit of Scouting alive in this area for a great long time. I will remember him fondly. That said, though I feel that on a certain level I should attend and pay my respects to his lovely wife and also to see some people that I haven't seen in years, I really gotta say that I just don't get want to. Some of those people that I think I need to see are more than capable of reaching out to me and just haven't. And then there are others that probably don't even remember me because I haven't been an active member in almost 6 years and I never really made a big impression on most of them anyway.
And to make this an even more craptastic week, both the kids are sick and now I've got it too. The Man had to take leave this week since my sitter wouldn't take the kids. I've been to a wake and a funeral. I am done! I really want this week to just be over!!!
Ugh! Sorry for your shit-tacular week. My advice - grieve how you need to grieve. And honestly, just going to pay your respects to his widow isn't worth it... she's probably overwhelmed by everything that is happening, and all of the people around. Yeah, sounds callous, but it's true. :)
ReplyDeleteAnyway, as always, huge huggs to you, my friend! XO